Masturbating is a fun, safe and completely natural way to pleasure yourself. Start by lubricating and exploring the whole body, including erogenous zones like the nipples, breasts, belly, inner thighs, anus, and clitoris.
Experiment with different positions, too. For example, lying on your back may not be the best position to stimulate the clitoris, but it might feel really good for other areas of the body.
1. Make a date.
When it comes to sex, most of us are taught that a partner is the key to pleasure. But, that’s not always possible — and not only is self-pleasure fun, it’s also crucial for maintaining healthy sexual receptivity.
In fact, research shows that people who don’t masturbate or engage in other sexual activities are more likely to suffer from sexual dysfunctions later in life. So, instead of waiting for a partner to turn you on, try these fail-proof ways to satisfy yourself sexually.
While manual stimulation (using your hands) is great, you can add a new dimension to self-pleasure by exploring sex toys. “Play with a variety of toys to experience different textures and sensations,” says Nicole DiFrank, a sexual health coach. For instance, you might try a sex toy with air suction technology or a crystal, glass or metal wand. Or, experiment with Pleasure Mapping, an exercise that involves looking at the genital map in the mirror and touching, massaging, or stroking the areas of your body you think feel good. And don’t forget to use lube!
2. Take a bath.
There’s a lot of advice out there about how to spice up sex with your partner, but it’s less common to hear tips for self-pleasure. That’s a shame because masturbating alone can be just as satisfying (if not more) than doing it with a partner.
One easy way to make masturbation more exciting is by taking a bath. The warm water can add a soothing, sensual element, and you can use different bath products to experiment with new sensations. Plus, a bathtub is usually pretty private, which makes it a great spot to explore your kinks without the worry of others interrupting you.
If you’re feeling adventurous, try running the bath faucet over erogenous zones like your clitoris or labia to see how it feels. Or you could lay back and let the water flow over your nipples or the back of your neck, which can also be pleasure-inducing. Just be careful not to get the water too hot! It might burn if it touches your sensitive skin. And don’t forget the lube. Using water-based lube in the bath can help your natural lubrication stay slippery and smooth.
3. Go for a walk.
Masturbation, which involves touching, pressing and massaging your genitals for pleasure, is a natural way to explore your body and can lead to sexual arousal and orgasm. When you masturbate, your body releases hormones like dopamine and oxytocin that make you feel good. It’s also an effective way to relieve stress.
When you’re ready to get your lick on, put on some sensual music and find yourself a private space where you can get down to business. Consider bringing some lube along to enhance the experience and ensure smooth gliding. (And keep in mind that masturbation can actually help prevent STIs.)
Some people find that imagining sexual scenarios or watching porn gets them in the mood, but remember to only watch material that feels safe and appropriate for you. You can also turn on your erotic brain by exercising, taking a hot bath, practicing yoga or reading a book that excites you.
4. Get a massage.
We all learned about our bodies as kids, playing with our fingers to figure out where we started and ended, and what felt good. But sexual exploration is often discouraged as kids, leaving a message that masturbation is an awful thing. A sex and relationships counselor can help determine the cause of an individual’s issues with self-pleasure and suggest effective treatment.
When you do decide to play on your own, make it a fun experience by adding lube and using a vibrator for an added sensation. A wand vibrator is the perfect choice for anal play, with or without a partner, as it offers direct pressure. And, for an extra boost, try edging (reaching the point of orgasm and backing off to prevent climax).
Explore all of your erogenous zones by stroking and rubbing different parts of your body; notice what feels good, where. Fantasize about what arouses you sexually, and share your pleasure-seeking adventures with your partner if it feels appropriate. And, don’t forget to charge your sex toys. A dead battery can be a total pleasure buzzkill.
5. Take a hot bath.
When it comes to self-pleasure, the bathtub might not be your first thought, but this sultry space can be a cozy place for exploring the pleasure points of your body. Just be sure to use a bath-safe lubricant and that all toys and plugs are clean and hygienic.
One popular technique involves lying down in the tub and letting water run over your vulva, says Good Vibrations staff sexologist Carol Queen. The flow of the water can stimulate the clitoral ridge and labia minora, she adds. It can also increase circulation in your pelvic area, helping you to reach full orgasm.
Another way to masturbate in the bath is to hold a pillow (or a stuffed animal or rolled up blanket) against your chest and rock forward and backward as you thrust your hips. The motion can feel amazing, and some people report reaching full orgasm with this method. It’s easy to do without making a mess and in privacy, making it ideal for those who live with roommates or parents. Afterwards, towel off and clean up any toys or props you used before taking the time to relax and bask in your self-pleasure session.
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